Category Archives: Smoking

SMOKING – follow up

Posted on November 6, 2009 | 6 Comments

before and after

actually it is the other way around in the before and after…just loved the picture

Now almost 22 months have passed since I quit smoking. I feel a lot better and like I am finally on the other side of the tunnel – healing as it were. About a month ago I felt up-building healing processes start. My body is getting more shapely and I am – oh so slowly – loosing body-fat (the swelling sensation). My energy-levels are up and I am getting really fit. I stopped the heavy-duty training I did with my trainer and have started creating my own programs with the help of diverse training-gurus around the world.

My digestive-system is almost back to normal, which is like such a high! My diet has changed since I noticed that certain foods don’t fit me. It is not always so easy, since one of the foods is bread and I love bread! But I eat with care and then it’s okay. I detox every month which always makes me feel really good and free.

spices / medicines

I am still waiting to loose the extra body-fat, but even in a bigger size I am looking great! I am so proud of myself for doing this, for finding the strength and the motivation to go through it, this in itself has given me a huge boost in self-confidence. I am also very grateful to myself for finally quitting smoking – the hardest, most awful and painful thing I have ever done. And I have grown as a person and therapist. All that I learned on this journey is invaluable knowledge on many levels; self-assurance, nutrition, exercise, toxicology, physiology and psychology. Everything is a learning experience.

Zen

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SMOKING – PAYBACK TIME

Posted on July 25, 2009 | 2 Comments

Quit smokingWhen I quit smoking I did all the normal things; checking internet and research for information about what happens in the body. I knew I really didn’t want to gain weight so I embarked on a very good dietary plan with detox and I exercised daily. I knew I could use my essential oils for irritation and other mood-swings. So far, so good.

As for mood-swings, I didn’t really have any. I would get cravings but they were not too bad, every time it happened I went walking or did something else and it would go away. But physically! Ajajaj…I got so sick! Immediately when I stopped I got constipated – big time. After 3 weeks I went to the doctor who gave me medication to get transit going. It helped a bit but the constipation only got worse, nothing would help. On top of that I suffered crippling pain in my musculo-sceletal system,  was constantly exhausted and gained weight relentlessly. I did research and nowhere did I find any information that even touched on the subject, all I got was positive stuff like: “you should now feel happier, more energetic, glowing skin, better breath”…etc… bla,bla,bla…NOT! I looked like shit, I felt like shit but I didn’t have a problem with cigarette-cravings. Sometimes I felt so bad that I would seriously think about smoking again, just to stop the suffering.

weakness

After about 4 months I found a brilliant Heilpraktikerin in Germany. She told me I was heavily toxic, analysis showed high levels of heavy metals, especially quicksilver and cadmium. On top of that I was still badly constipated. The Heilprakterin taught me how to administer different herb-enemas to counter the constipation which was getting worse with every passing day. I then embarked on a big cleansing-trip; Detox every 3 weeks with different herbs, enemas every second day to not irritate the system, strict diet with no milk-products, bread, pasta, sugar, alcohol, meat or most fish. Changing dietary habits is really difficult, especially as I already had good habits. I just had to go extreme for some time to heal. My daughter, of course, continued to eat normally as she needs her nourishment.

Today 18 months have passed and I am slowly healing, at least I am on the right side. It is very slow going and sometimes I can feel really low on motivation when I don’t see the results I want. My constipation lasted 13(!) months, during which time I had natural transit only 3 times. I didn’t resort to medication since it only worsens everything. My digestive system is now in order but I still pay attention to what, how and when I eat.

I have had a personal trainer the last 5 months who helps me to work my body into health again, I am strong and fit and I don’t experience any pain. I still have too high levels of toxins in my system but it is slowly clearing. My skin is better, and I have more energy. I am not really loosing any weight as of yet and I still detox every 3 weeks.

SUMMARY: After 18 months of research, I still haven’t found anything that even slightly resembles what I have gone through. I have spoken to plenty of people that had the same experience and they say this was the reason they went back to smoking after time-spans of 1 or more years. I have spoken to doctors and researchers and finally a picture emerges:

  • Nicotine leaves your body-system quite rapidly but stays as an emotional, mental or psychological dependence which is the hardest to kick.
  • The heavy metals in cigarettes are stored in the skeletal-system. Once the body is not receiving more metals it dumps large amounts of the stored metals into the system which then goes toxic. To counter this the body builds up fatty deposits to hold and store the toxins. If these fatty deposits are shed too quickly there is a toxicology problem and this is the reason why it takes such a long time to loose it.

I think different people have different reactions; we all have different genetic weaknesses in our body-systems, apparently mine is the digestive-system. I also think that the physical reaction to quitting smoking is dependent on how long and how much we have smoked. I know plenty of people who has no problem at all. But I am angry that this information is not readily available. I am a therapist and tend to see myself as a study -  this helps me through a lot of difficulty because I am my school; I am studying myself from outside. But I so understand people who go back to smoking. Maybe with more knowledge we can be better prepared to return to health on the other side of smoking. I really believe smoking to be a terrible thing – a killer in disguise – and I am sure it will soon be banned all together. At that point honest and true information is needed to help people, not only this starry-eyed rubbish that is served up today, because we all do know that we will be healthier without smoking.

This said, nobody can better understand the dilemma of smoking than me. I have no opinions on other people’s smoking, I don’t think that is my business. But if I can help someone through the difficulties of quitting, I am more than glad to help.

Strength-training

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SMOKING – the art of quitting

Posted on July 21, 2009 | 1 Comment

smokingI read somewhere; “I don’t stop smoking ’cause I am not a quitter”. I found that really funny and slightly applicable to myself. How many times did I quit? Only to find myself in a state of desperation, sneaking around in the bushes with my illicit smoking, pretending and lying to those closest and dearest to me – and this is when I was well past youth. How embarassing isn’t that!

At one point the smoking really started to make itself known in negative ways; my voice slowly changed and I noticed I was loosing my singing-voice, sometimes my teeth would hurt when I had smoke in my mouth, every morning I woke up with my hands numb from poor circulation…and other  minor stuff. I didn’t tell anybody of this, because then I would be forced to do something about it – quit smoking, and I wasn’t prepared to do that right yet. But I knew that I had to – soon. I wanted so much to not smoke, still I had to light that cigarette even though I sometimes almost cried from the frustration of it -but quit? No.

Then I met a man who never smoked, when we were together I never smoked, even for days on end and it was okay. I could do that. But the first thing I did upon parting was to reach for my cigarettes. One day I knew I would be able to quit, but not when. I started changing my way of thinking, re-programming my Self; Instead of beating myself up about smoking I embraced myself as a smoker – forgiving and accepting myself and letting go of the shame, frustration and feeling of weakness. I enjoyed every cigarette to the maximum while I started to visualize myself as a non-smoker. I changed certain habits and made myself aware of my smoking-patterns; both physical and emotional. At the same time came the smoke-ban in restaurants and most other public places which helped a lot. I will not go outside in the cold to smoke whilst having dinner in a restaurant…I am much too proud.

This conscious re-programming went on for about half a year. With time I became that new individual, the one in control. I never told anybody that I would quit, because that creates an enormous pressure which is hard to handle. That pressure alone will make anybody reach for the smokes, trust me. Stress = smoking BIG TIME. Besides which, do we really want to be constantly hassled by other people? They will leave you alone as a smoker but hassle your brain out when you are quitting and they are supposed to be supportive. No, quitting smoking is a private thing. It is between you and your Self.

One Sunday evening I realized I had only two cigarettes left. I could smoke one and save one for next morning. While I was – very consciously – planning this I felt: “this is it, now I quit”. I smoked them both and knew that tomorrow was the first day. I have done this before, so sure of myself in the evening, only to wake up in desperation the next morning, rushing for the nearest smoke, hating myself for my weakness. But this Monday morning I woke up knowing with all of my Self that it was finally over; after 35 years of smoking, I would never smoke again. I was happy and calm.

So far, so good. Then comes all the rest – the results and imbalances of many years of smoking. The suffering and hardships of getting back in balance and health. This will be my next post.

to be continued

smoking-quitting

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SMOKING

Posted on July 19, 2009 | Leave a comment

smoking-fashionI was always a smoker. The first time I smoked a cigarette was right before I turned 12, and it was the most wonderful experience. I didn’t feel sick, only a bit dizzy and I liked this feeling very much. I was deeply unhappy and lost in this time of my life, and smoking gave me something nice, something to look forward to. Nobody knew that I smoked, it was my private sanctuary. Both my parents were heavy smokers who smoked everywhere; in the house, in the car, in bed the last thing before sleep and first thing upon waking up. My mother smoked during pregnancy and during breastfeeding. Smoking at this time was most fashionable and even attractive, remember the fashion-pictures of the time? Or the advertisements that went before:

When I started my training as a therapist it was very obvious to me that I had to stop smoking, but I couldn’t. I tried and just couldn’t. Years went by and I learned to sort of “control” my smoking. A lot of people didn’t even realize I smoked. I was always ashamed of it and made all kind of excuses to why I smoked. The main one being – of course, considering my history – emotional. Which, in a way, was true but not the whole truth. In my youth I did drugs and stopped without too big problems, so what was going on with the cigarettes?

A lot of people my age were heavily programmed with the smoking; everywhere we went – there it was; smoking in restaurants, bars, waiting rooms and in fashion. Beautiful and attractive smoking paraphernalia, advertisements… smoking was very much a part of life. Added to that, our receptors for nicotine were up and kicking just from existing in society…well, the outcome is given – smoking is the way to go! For me and a lot of others, the “ingredients” in cigarettes were part of our physical make-up, seeing as we were constantly imbued with the toxins from even before the moment of conception.

Here is a list of all the 599 known additives in cigarettes; upon reading it I was wondering if there is anything they haven’t put in there. It almost verges on being ridiculous if it wasn’t for the severe dangers of so many of the additives.

http://quitsmoking.about.com/cs/nicotineinhaler/a/cigingredients_2.htm

The nicotine that seems to have everybody so worried is only one of all the additives in cigarettes. Nicotine leaves the body quite rapidly but heavy metals and other chemicals are stored in your body-system and takes a very long time to get rid of. I would say that nicotine is only a part of the problem. Too bad not enough attention has been focused on some of the other additives: (following is taken from about.com)

Benzene
Benzene can be found in pesticides and gasoline. It is present in high levels in cigarette smoke and accounts for half of all human exposure to this hazardous chemical.

Pesticides
Pesticides are used on our lawns and gardens, and inhaled into our lungs via cigarette smoke.

Formaldehyde
Formaldehyde is a chemical used to preserve dead bodies, and is responsible for some of the nose, throat and eye irritation smokers experience when breathing in cigarette smoke.

Chemicals in Cigarettes: Toxic Metals

Toxic / heavy metals are metals and metal compounds that have the potential to harm our health when absorbed or inhaled. In very small amounts, some of these metals support life, but when taken in large amounts, can become toxic.

Arsenic
Commonly used in rat poison, arsenic finds its way into cigarette smoke through some of the pesticides that are used in tobacco farming.

Cadmium
Cadmium is a toxic heavy metal that is used in batteries. Smokers typically have twice as much cadmium in their bodies as nonsmokers.

Chemicals in Cigarettes: Poisons

Poison is defined as any substance that, when introduced to a living organism, causes severe physical distress or death. Science has discovered approximately 200 poisonous gases in cigarette smoke.

Ammonia
Ammonia compounds are commonly used in cleaning products and fertilizers. Ammonia is also used to boost the impact of nicotine in manufactured cigarettes.

Carbon Monoxide
Carbon monoxide is present in car exhaust and is lethal in very large amounts. Cigarette smoke can contain high levels of carbon monoxide.

Hydrogen Cyanide
Hydrogen cyanide was used to kill people in the gas chambers in Nazi Germany during World War II. It can be found in cigarette smoke.

Nicotine
Nicotine is a poison used in pesticides and is the addictive element in cigarettes.

In coming posts I will tell you my story and some of all what I discovered. Hopefully it will be of help to others, I certainly wish I had had this information from the start.

to be continued…

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